scrumptious coffee table,this.
uff.

this is jillian ditner,an artist from toronto,
the one below is called 'corner',i like the trajectory of thought,so obviously visible from piece to another.like frames of thought.
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she shares a site with drew khan another artist from canada,an interestingly similar tone of wistfulness in their cumulative work..



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the one above is called 'detached' : )



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the one above is called 'missed'.
like someone who saw my film once commented,'i think you have interesting concerns.'
i like the concerns here.

so,this is a site i've started nurturing an addiction to,it's by this guy todd selby,who's taken to documenting slightly oblique people in their living environs.so many stories,the one that got me the most was of grace and kenyan...seemed like a fairytale.they actually live here.this is actually their home.if it adds any to the effect,these pics were taken 5 days back.
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..maybe together we can get somewhere,you've got a fast car..

what i've been doing,where i've been at.

itchy and scratchy again.
damn.
the image just below is of the plains of mongolia.the dream theatre for too long now.












i've got the itch again.planning to set off.
have a look at this photography blog by dan eckstein, documenting his travels as a profession.

meryl smith's sludge.

please keep a track of the music you love by signing up on last.fm.
i could cry with the amount of music i rediscover there.

belmondo needs to live again.
because milann believes again.lol..

for the guy who brought me back to life today.
hello world.
listening to music here,you could tap in by the hour.
i'll see you around.

to and fro.with no permission.

TO :



"
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June 30,2008.
I always believed in serpendity and coincindences ...some of my senstive moments in my life have been great coincidences I think these episodes have been happening to all of us and we always used to feel "It couldn't be just coincidence."

I was wondering are these events sheer coincidence or because of our mental telepathy or psychic stirrings?


Rational
I feel there are two features of coincidences not well known among us.First,we tend to overlook the powerful reinforcement of coincidences, both waking and in dreams, in our memories. Non-coincidental events do not register in our memories with nearly the same intensity.
Second, we fail to realize the extent to which highly improbable events occur daily to everyone. It is not possible to estimate all the probabilities of many paired events that occur in our daily lives.We often tend to assign coincidences a lesser probability than they deserve.

Reason
Our brains are fantastic pattern recognition engines, a characteristic which is highly useful for learning, but it does cause the brain to lend excessive importance to unremarkable events. Considering how many words, names,people and ideas a person is exposed to in any given day and we sometimes encounter the same information again within a short time. When that occasional intersection occurs, the brain promotes the information because the two instances make up the beginnings of a sequence. What we fail to notice is the hundreds or thousands of pieces of information which aren't repeated, because they do not conform to an interesting pattern.

Coincidences themselves are usually just an artifact of perception. We tend to underestimate the probability of coinciding events, so our expectations are at odds with reality. And non-coincidental events do not grab our attention with anywhere near the same intensity, because coincidences are patterns, and the brain actually stimulates us for successfully detecting patterns… hence their inflated value. In short, patterns are habit-forming.

Logical

Proablity says in a random selection of twenty-three persons there is a 50 percent chance that at least two of them celebrate the same birthdate.
The calculation is straightforward. First find the probability that everyone in a group of people have different birthdates (X) and then subtract this fraction from one to obtain the probability of at least one common birthdate in the group (P), P = 1 - X. Probabilities range from 0 to 1, or may be expressed as 0 to 100%. For no coincident birthdates a second person has a choice of 364 days, a third person 363 days, and the nth person 366 - n days. So the probability for all different birthdates becomes
365!
--------------------- = Xn
(365-n)!*(365^n)

With its factorials the last equality is not especially useful unless one possesses the capability of handling very large numbers.When n = 23, one finds X = 0.493 and P = 0.507. This shows that the probability of at least two people sharing a common birthdate rises slowly, at first passing just less than 12% probability with ten people, rising through 50% probability corresponding to twenty-three people,reaching 90% probability in a group of forty-one people. This means that on the average, out of ten random groups of forty-one persons, in nine of them at least two persons will celebrate identical birthdates. No mysterious forces are needed to explain this coincidence.

Experimental

In a experiment of asking people what was more likely from a lotto draw (6 numbers 'randomly' drawn from 40):
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
or
4, 13, 18, 23, 31, 37 (or any arbitrary non-sequential set)

Invariably they went for the second option (unless they already understood the concept or were second guessing their 'answer')
A summation of the reasoning was along the lines of "I'd remember if those numbers came out, but they never have"
how often do you look at strangers who were same dress or same car as yours on the road? You always notice it.



More to write.

"



FRO:
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..

"
July 1,2008.
your articulation is impressive.
possibly that is what i struggle with as well...i mean the fight
always seems to be building the language which can allow me to
communicate what i can sense.
i have ended up building multiple vocabularies to only a little beyond
the natal stage unfortunately.hell,but the effort is on,and is
sometimes so deceptive it feels like I'm actally doing nothing at all.
lol...
anyway,yes, i believe we choose to give importance to only the
coincidences that appeal to our present state of mind.part of what i
found vexing earlier because i knew there was a lot happening,many
signs,many entry points open which i could not see because i possibly
hadn't reached a conclusion of thought on some other subject.
this is what some film makers do while making films as well...
as in for example if the indian music composers like an a r rehman did
not copy from western classical music,or an anu malik from popular
western music,then there would very be very few chances that an
indian public would be able to get an entry to tthe new sound. you
can't just give them the concentrated sound and expect them to give it
a listening.you get it to sound like from their context and then they
can start digesting it.some might even take it ahead and trace the
particular sound to its source. most just wait for more from their
identified sources of kitsch.
but all of this bridge making is important.we have one life,and not
many people have the luxury of exposing themselves to other
contexts.so cheers to anu malik!

so with co incidence,i think we actually pile in a lot of data
floating in the intertext and when it falls into our direct context we
draw personal connections and claim for example that we are haunted by
a word we happened to come across just the other day,we see it on
billboards,in ads,on TV,everywhere. truth is it's always been there.
like the tao idea that all the solutions are as clear as the problem
and as available.



this isn't complete,will write soon.
"

i try pegging down ghosts in this land of the dead.
that is all.

because i believe i was meant to be 25 in the sixties....here's where i found a chronology through pictures of richard avedon and interviews by doon arbus,while the portraits were being taken of the icons of the sixties...showcasing one here..



'JANIS JOPLIN,
blues/rock singer
Port Arthur, Texas
September 3, 1969

I have like what anyone would call like, say, a loneliness, a loneliness of my own. But it's just a private trip and probably shouldn't be forced on other people that much, you know what I mean? God, fuck it. Who cares how lonely you feel. You just have to learn to deal with it like everybody else does. Everybody has that, I think. Everybody. Even Christians.

I remember I used to think, goddamn it, it's because I'm a chick or it's because I haven't figured it out yet. It's because I'm not twenty-one. It's because I haven't read this or I haven't tried that.... Well, I've done every fucking thing and now I know better. There is no "because." And it's not going to get any better.

My father.... See, my father is a very intelligent man and I used to talk to him a lot because he reads and he's pretty sensitive and I was a mixed-up kid and too smart for my age-right? Anyway, so when I was eighteen, I ran away. Well,...went to California. One day this thing comes along and I learned something. It went pfshutt right in the side of my head and I sat up...and realized something. I ran up and wrote a long, long letter to my father all about how I'd felt growing up was like climbing a hill and that sooner or later you'd figure it out and it'd all come together and you'd level out and it wouldn't be such a fucking struggle every day, you know?... But then I realized there wasn't any leveling out, you know? You have the same fucking problem- or more-when you get old. I mean, you got more to deal with. It isn't gonna turn that corner, man. It just keeps going right on straight uphill.

So I wrote my father and explained this whole thing. Well, the next time I came home-my father has this friend, another man who's also very intelligent-and my father had evidently let him read my letter. You know, "Look what Janis is going through." They were proud of me because I was a thinker and they liked that because they were thinkers. So when I got home, this guy comes up to me and he says, "Well, I hear you learned about the Great Saturday Night Swindle." That's what he called it.

The realization that there isn't going to be any turning point.... There isn't going to be any next-month-it'll-be-better, next fucking year, next fucking life. You don't have any time to wait for. You just got to look around you and say, So this is it. This is really all there is to it. This little thing. Everybody needing such little things and they can't get them. Everybody needing just a little...confidence from somebody else and they can't get it. Everybody, everybody fighting to protect their little feelings. Everybody, you know, like reaching out tentatively but drawing back. It's so shallow and seems so...fucking...it seems like such a shame. It's so close to being like really right and good and open and amorphous and giving and everything. But it's not. And it ain't gonna be.'


if you haven't heard the lady sing yet,you might want to watch her here...


or listen to the song 'try' here please.

this is work by hanna wieslander.
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what i like about her work are the strokes,her hands are free.she has fluid thought.i admire the punctuation.i envy the delivery.
you might want to see some of her work. i love it when people's personal style shows brilliantly in even the commercial work they do.i respect that. it usually draws a lot of blood from me.and i'm not into the angst these days.